I grew up on a small island in Florida. In retrospect, it has made me into a chill adult who is on Island Time (unless it comes to people texting me back. Why can't they do that in a timely fashion?), but as a child it kind of sucked. I was about to digress into why being a kid sucked but I'll go on about that another time. Anyway, at that time the island had one very popular ice-cream parlor that also sold fudge and similar chocolate-covered treats, and there would be tons of tourists just eating up their ice cream in January while locals looked at them in disgust. "Who eats ice cream in winter?", we'd say disdainfully of these filthy perverts.
Anyway, now I am an adult (alhamdulillah), and my blood has thickened from not being in Florida for three years and I eat ice cream in the winter. What is exciting now is that people make weird flavors of ice cream and I am all about this life. I always wanted an ice cream maker so I could make my own weird ice cream. I might have to look into this more. I heard the modern ones could be kind of fussy so maybe I can get the old style one with the crank. When I heard about Persian ice cream - bastani - I kind of made up my own method for it as I knew I was not going to get bastani anywhere near my hometown. The closest thing they have to middle easterners are the weirdo Zionists who run the Sunoco. Anyway. My system was to buy vanilla ice cream and let it soften a bit, and put it in the blender with some saffron water and rose water. Also I would pour heavy cream on a plate and freeze it and break it up into chunks with a knife and mix it with the blended ice cream and refreeze it. Not terrible and better than no bastani. I just had black sesame and toasted coconut ice cream and it was so grand. Sometimes I dream of having a weird ice cream truck. It is only a dream because people do not appreciate weirdness, they appreciate vanilla and chocolate. The biggest scam is Superman ice cream, which is just vanilla with a bunch of coloring in it, what a crock. As a child I favored the bubble gum ice cream, personally, or cookies and creme. Anyway. A weird ice cream truck. How fun would that be? I would like it to play some fun music. What is that ice cream music, anyway? It sounds like a music box. How do they do it? I googled and I got noise. It's a mystery. That's okay. Although apparently you can play theremin music through the ice cream truck. Can you imagine? Your pal playing the piano part of Saint-Saƫns' "The Swan" on a Casio keyboard while the cello part is on the theremin?
Hmm, hmm, hmm! Let me immerse myself in my ice cream dream.
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AuthorArtist, essayist, divinity school dropout. Here for a good time, not for a long time. Archives
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